How slow is to slow when dating
Our generation — hell, probably every generation — puts too much emphasis on sex.I understand sex is a big part of any successful relationship.I went on a first date a couple of nights ago and ended up in the bathroom of some random downtown bar. the chances of a true romantic relationship coming out of that are low.But it isn't just rushing into sex that kills the chances of creating real love.Once we meet a man we really like, we women tend to dive right in.We want to give our hearts, mind and very soul to a man, and meld together into a perfect relationship.Many women are stuck on their ‘type’ and if their date meets that criteria they give them license to say and do whatever shady behavior that suits them.It makes sense to proceed slowly and cautiously because once emotions get involved, it’s almost like all common sense goes out the window and we stop paying attention to those red flags that would’ve had us hitting the exits early on.
When we close off our options with other men too soon, we actually sabotage our ability to get the commitment and intimacy we so desire.Do not jump in with your whole heart- get to know the person so you don’t fall in love with the idea of him, but the actual person and what he is offering you (not what you hope or wish he’ll offer you.) Avoid thinking about him all of the time, which creates a habit of preoccupation which can lead to obsession- which definitely isn’t based on who he is- but the idea of him, and will make moving on more difficult to do.DO NOT envision or plan the future in your head, or plug him into your life before you know whether he is worthy of being a big part of your life.I do believe that we should love as much and as often as possible, but we do need to practice some restraint.This for the good of the relationship, for your future together, and for your own sanity.